Johnson Khoo 
FastTrac is a practical, hands-on business development program designed to help entrepreneurs hone the skills needed to create, manage and grow successful businesses. FastTrac is America’s leading entrepreneurial learning program and remains on the cutting edge by providing programs that are written by entrepreneurs, facilitated by entrepreneurs, for entrepreneurs.
(You can visit their website here)
I had the privilege of going through this program as part of the Allstars Accelerator Program which E-Class Asia was participating in. Through the program, I learnt many specific skill sets on entrepreneurship and got access to many valuable tools that were extremely useful in helping me prototype my idea, validate business models, generate financial projections and so on.
“FastTrac is America’s leading entrepreneurial learning program and remains on the cutting edge by providing programs that are written by entrepreneurs, facilitated by entrepreneurs, for entrepreneurs…”
Allstars is Malaysia’s first truly Entrepreneur-run & Mentor-driven Accelerator Program for Start-Ups. It is founded by a group of very successful entrepreneurs and investors who truly enjoy helping startups and believe that in AllStars they are providing a great platform for entrepreneurs to succeed.
(You can visit their website here)
In 2012, E-Class Asia got selected to be part of the Allstars Accelerator Program. After going through a series of workshops and mentoring sessions, we were selected to present during Demo Day to a Panel of investors comprising Kwee Bee from Teak Capital & Suresh Thiru from Jobstreet, among others, whom we got to have further meetings with.
“Allstars is Malaysia’s first truly Entrepreneur-run & Mentor-driven Accelerator Program for Start-Ups…”
I don’t know if they still do this, but back then, top Singaporean schools would source for candidates to be offered the ASEAN Scholarship [A full all expense paid scholarship for students to complete their high school and pre-u education in Singapore] by inviting the top students of selected primary schools in Kuala Lumpur to sit for a test which takes place once a year.
THE RANDOM TEST
So, one fine day in 2002, my form teacher told me and a few of my classmates to go for a test that weekend. At that time, I had no idea what that test was all about, but I went nevertheless.
On that day, I sat through a series of tests which included an IQ Test, English comprehension & composition tests, as well as a math test with plenty of questions about things that I have never come across before at the time.
The IQ & English tests were easy for me, because it seemed like common sense and my command of English for a 12 year old was quite strong at the time due to my love of reading books and encyclopedias. The math test, however, was challenging, and I had to come up with my own formulas based on my common sense and my own understanding in an attempt to solve the questions.
THE SURPRISE INTERVIEW
To my surprise, I received a call later that day asking me to come back for an interview the next day, which I went together with my parents.
The interview was rather casual; the interviewer, who happened to be my future school’s headmistress, simply had a friendly conversation with me in which she asked me about my hobbies, my family, my thoughts on certain topics and so on.
At the end, she asked me: “So would you like to study in Singapore?”
I din’t know how to answer, because frankly, I din’t even know what the interview was about!
I thought it was just some test and some casual chat session. (pardon me for my innocence, I was only 12 years old then)
So I honestly replied, “Err.. I don’t know, you will have to ask my parents about that”.
HOW MY PARENTS SAID YES
As a result, the headmistress and her team from Singapore explained the merits of the ASEAN Scholarship to my parents, including how it was an all expense paid scholarship for me to complete my high school and pre-u in Singapore which includes food, lodging, school fees and also a yearly allowance.
In the end, I remembered my parents asking something along the lines of : “So everything is free is it?”
To which they replied “Yes”
And my parents were like “Okay, why not”.
And that’s how I ended up in Singapore for the next 6 years of my life.
I also remembered that my parents had second thoughts about it afterwards when they realized that I would not be at home for the next few years, especially my mom, but in the end they decided that it was best for me to go, and so I went.
THE REALIZATION
Only then did I realize that it was actually a scholarship admission test, and I was selected to go because I happened to be the top student in my cohort at that time and also the head prefect.
The school that I was assigned to go to was Catholic High School, which happened to be the alma mater of Singapore’s current Prime Minister, Lee Hsien Loong; son of Singapore’s founding father Lee Kuan Yew.
(Read more here)
I thought that was great because if I did not get the scholarship, I was planning to go to Catholic High School Malaysia in Petaling Jaya because I was in the school band, loved it, and knew that Catholic High School Petaling Jaya had a great school band which I could join. It was also a co-ed school, so I assumed that the one in Singapore would be the same.
THE SHOCKING DISCOVERY
But to my surprise, on the first day of school in Singapore, I realized something odd.
There were no girls!
Only then did I realize that Catholic High School was a single-sex school, as with most top schools in Singapore, and I was doomed to spend the next 4 years at least with a school full of guys. Oops.
But looking back, it was one of the best 4 years of my life, where I thoroughly enjoyed the strong camaraderie among my “brothers” and really discovered myself and grew as a person. It was my formative years.
THE “BROTHERHOOD”
We had many camps and trips as a cohort where we would get to camp in the woods, go kayaking, abseiling, flying fox, setting up camp in a cave, cycle for 54km in Taman Negara, Pahang etc. During our secondary 3 camp, we managed to complete a series of activities that a co-ed school took 2 weeks to complete in 1.
I really enjoyed the experience of cycling such a long distance and spending the night in a cave. It was an eye-opener to me.
Of course, I also had a great time in my hostel (which you can read more about here) and the Symphonic Band (CHSSB, which you can read more about here).
So that was how I got “conned” into an all boys school and started my 6 year education in Singapore, which I thoroughly enjoyed.
HUMBLED & INSPIRED TO LEARN
It was also when I realized that there were so many smart people in the world.
When I was in primary school, I thought I was pretty smart, because the things the teach in school seemed easy, and I could get full marks for English or math papers. But when I went to Singapore, I realized that there were so many people who were much smarter than me.
During my first Semester in Catholic High, I failed my English, which came as a shock to me because English was supposed to be one of my stronger subjects. But then I realized that a significant number of my classmates failed it as well. But nevertheless, it still made me realized that I still have, and will always have so much to learn!
I later realized that top schools in Singapore like to set extremely hard internal papers so that their students will not be complacent and will do well in the actual O Level Examinations at the end of the 4 year course, especially for English, so most of us would be getting Bs or Cs for the most part but would still end up with an A for the actual O Levels.
With considerable effort, which involved me reading extensively and reading the thesaurus in an attempt to improve my vocabulary, I managed to be one of the few students who scored an A in our internal preliminary exams in our final year, and achievement which I was proud of.
DISCOVERING MY ACADEMIC STRENGTHS & WEAKNESSES
I also realized that I am naturally better in language based subjects like History, English, Geography , Social Studies or perhaps Biology, but struggled at number and formula based subjects like Math and Sciences, especially Additional Math & Physics, a trait about myself I discovered that would eventually influence me to do law in the future and be an entrepreneur instead of a pilot (which used to be one of my childhood dreams).
LANGUAGE/HUMANITIES VS MATH/SCIENCES
For example, I could score close to full marks and top the cohort in History papers without studying much, but struggled hard with math and sciences, with the exception of Biology, because it was largely essay and explanation based and does not involve much calculation.
It is not that I do not understand Math & Sciences, I did, but I just found it really tedious to work out solutions in the form of formulas where one small mistake in copying would screw up the entire answer.
I guess it also din’t help that I did not do much of my homework and assignments ever since I left primary school, I would usually copy the answers for mandatory assignments and the exams themselves would usually be my first practice, which probably explains why my grades usually jump from a C or B to an A by the final year examinations, because I would have had more “practice” by then.
It worked out for me because the final year examinations made up 55% of the final results for the year, which pulled my grades up tremendously so I would still get an A in the end even though I was averaging Cs and Bs throughout the year because my final year results were enough to pull me up into the A bracket.
So, this is how I discovered my strength in languages and my weaknesses in number based subjects.
JUNIOR COLLEGE & ‘A’ LEVELS
When it came to apply for my preferred junior college (the place where students complete their pre-u studies if you’re taking A Levels), I chose to go to Victoria Junior College (VJC) although I could enter Raffles Junior College (RJC) or Hwa Chong Institution (HCI) if I wanted to with my results.
Throughout my secondary school life, I have always wanted to go to RJ, this was because I stayed at Raffles Institution Boarding (RIB) for most of my duration of study in Catholic High (because both are in Bishan and Catholic High does not have a boarding school of our own) and I’ve met some amazing Malaysian seniors who were studying in RJ, so I’ve always aimed to go there.
However, everything changed when I visited VJ for the first time during their open house.
THE CONTAGIOUS VJ SPIRIT
The VJ spirit was just so alluring that I just felt like I wanted to be part of this school.
I still remembered how VJ seniors were dressed in pirate costumes, handing out flyers and welcoming us as we got off the bus at the VJ bus stop. I was really impressed when I saw how genuinely friendly the people were, how vibrant and lively the atmosphere was and hey, they have a tree house! They really blew me away then they started doing a mass dance out of nowhere, and there were people dancing on the roof, it was totally crazy. It made me think to myself, man this is a cool school!
THE BEACH, THE VIEW & THE CYCLING EXPERIENCE
After that, my senior from Catholic High who was now in VJ as a first year sneaked me up to Victoria Hall, which was the place scholars who went to VJ stayed. When I found out that it was by the seaside, just next to East Coast Park, you could see the sea from your room and you could cycle to school every day along the seaside park connector, that just totally sealed the deal for me. I decided then that I was going to be a Victorian!
(Read more here)
DISCOVERY MY TRUE PASSION
My time in VJ played a significant role in shaping who I am and what I am doing today. It was during my time in VJ that I discovered my passion and what I really loved doing.
During my time in Catholic High School, I was this laid back guy who just wanted to mind his own business. Sure I enjoyed my time playing in the symphonic band, hanging out with friends, playing basketball, searching for good food and participating in the occasional DOTA & Counter Strike Sessions, but other than that, I largely preferred to spend time alone reading or learning things by myself.
It was during JC that I started to want to be involved in more activities and mix around with more people. So besides joining the symphonic band, I also joined the basketball team for a brief stint, became part of the founding team of the college’s first ever cheer leading team (read more here), got involved in writing, directing and acting in a stage drama performance and also got involved in a dance performance.
This was when I discovered that I actually love meeting new people and making friends. This was also when I discovered that I actually love bringing awesome people together so we could do something interesting or meaningful together, be it performing, doing something crazy like camping on an island or be part of the pioneer batch of cheerleaders who won in their debut year.
THE RESULTING EFFECTS
It was because of these realizations while I was at VJ that I am now involved in entrepreneurship and became the person I am today.
(read more here)
In essence, these 6 years in Singapore taught me how to be independent, to live life to the fullest and helped me realize my strengths, weaknesses, likes, dislikes as well as my passion in life.
In short, you could say that they were the formative years in my life which largely contributed to who I became today.
“Everyone goes through a process of self-discovery to arrive at where and who they are today, and this is my journey…”
I was first inspired by the power of entrepreneurship when I heard about the story of how a doctor and an entrepreneur came together to make eye cataract surgery affordable for the poor in India.
PREVENTING MILLIONS FROM GOING BLIND
In the 1970s, eye cataract surgery was expensive, but was widespread and many of the poor in India would never be able to afford it. It was devastating to them because they would eventually go blind without surgery, and would lose their livelihood.
An ophthalmologist, Dr.Govindappa Venkataswamy, started a hospital that operates at such efficiency that they were able to heavily subsidize the cost of those who can’t afford it from the money earned from those who are able to. An average surgeon in the hospital performs 2,000 surgeries per year while the average in the United States per surgeon was only 125.
It was this efficiency and volume that allowed such a hybrid business model to succeed.
LOWERING MARGINS, INCREASING VOLUME
After 15 years, when the costs of intraocular lenses required for the surgery risen dramatically and threatened the viability of such a business model, he partnered with American entrepreneur David Green to start Aurolab, which manufactures almost 1.8 million pieces of such lenses on-site for a price as low as $2, much lower than the market rate.
Through their efforts, their venture was able to prevent numerous poor people in India from going blind and losing their livelihoods. They were able to do so by innovating on the way they performed the surgeries & manufacturing the lenses, in the process increasing its efficiency, lowering its costs and lowering their profit margin tremendously.
However, though their profit margin is low, they were able to sustain the business and expand it because the volume of surgeries and lenses they could sell was so high due to such a low price.
THE POWER OF ENTREPRENEURSHIP
This amazed me because I saw how we could impact the world in a significant & sustainable way while making money through entrepreneurship.
It was a win-win situation.
MONEY – A POWERFUL AMPLIFIER
This got me thinking, and I realized that money is not evil, it is just a very powerful tool.
It is an amplifier, in the hands of the evil, it can be used to do a tremendous amount of evil, in the hands of the good, it can be used to do a tremendous amount of good, as in such instances.
It is the greed and love of money, that is evil, that causes us to lose our direction, values and ethics, not money itself. Money, coupled with the spirit of entrepreneurship, innovation, and business acumen, is what drives society forward, and help make the world a better place in a sustainable manner.
CREATING SUSTAINABLE VALUE
Air Asia was able to make air travel affordable to most people by innovating on its business model, Facebook was able to connect us better, Google was able to organize the world’s information in a accessible manner, while kick-starting other innovations such as self-driving cars and internet access for underdeveloped areas via high altitude balloons.
All these innovations would not have been able to take off or be sustainable if not for the entrepreneurial ecosystem and spirit, which is always looking for viable and sustainable ways to make the world a better place.
MAKING A DIFFERENCE
Hence, as I learnt more about entrepreneurship, I became convinced that entrepreneurship was the best way to go to make a lasting difference in the world, or as Steve Jobs would say, to leave a dent in the universe, because unlike charities and NGOs, it can keep funding itself to keep it sustainable.
Furthermore, it is also a good way to attain the financial & economic influence required to funds initiatives and charities which entrepreneurship has yet to find an entrepreneurial solution to.
This is why I have decided to embark on an entrepreneurial journey of my own, in hopes of bringing talented people together to create something that could make a lasting positive impact on the world.
“The ones who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who usually do”
8 years ago in Singapore, when I was 16, I chanced upon a 6 part series on “Choosing The Right Partner For Life”, in which it summarized the key principles in choosing the right life partner for ourselves and how to build strong lasting relationships in a comprehensive set of principles such as “The 8 Types Of Relationships That Won’t Work” & “5 Compatibility Time Bombs To Look Out For In A Relationship” etc.
STUMBLING UPON A SET OF RELATIONSHIP TRUTHS
At first, probably like what you’re thinking right now, I was skeptical.
I mean, relationships are complicated right?
Each and every one is unique.
How can you have a comprehensive and definitive guide to relationships such as “The 8 Types Of Relationships That Won’t Work” & categorize relationships into such “types”?
It just sounded impossible and too good to be true.
But out of curiosity, I listened anyway.
PRE-IDENTIFYING RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS AMONG FRIENDS
However, over the years, as many of my friends started getting into relationships (I happen to have many friends across all ages, from friends my age till those in their 30s and 40s); sometimes, when two people whom I know personally got together, I would start realizing things like “Oh no, they seem to fall under these few types of relationships that won’t work, or would be caught in this relationship time bomb”, or that one of them wasn’t ready etc, and according to the guide, their relationships won’t work or are in danger of not working should they not diffuse the “time bomb” in time and so on.
OBSERVING BUT DOING NOTHING ABOUT IT
But of course, since I was still skeptical about the truthfulness and practicality of those principles, I just kept quiet, congratulated my friends and just moved on with life.
THE SHOCKING DISCOVERY
But true enough, a few years down the road, those very couples eventually did break up, and some ended quite badly. And somehow, my friends tend to confide in me, and what really shocked me was that the reasons why they broke up was exactly those few that I’ve identified right from the start based on those set of principles, and I mean exactly.
Now, it is perfectly normal for couples to get together and break up, especially for people around my age from 16-24, but to be able to identify and PINPOINT exactly why a couple would or would not break up in the end and WHY, right from the start was another thing altogether!
CONSISTENCY IS SUCH DISCOVERIES
Furthermore, this wasn’t just one couple, it was many many couples from those around my age till those much older than me, and the guide and set of principles has proven to be 100% true until today.
So I thought to myself:
“Wow, there must be some truth to this thing!”
FINDING OUT MORE
Curious, I went on to do some research on the set of principles (read more here), and I realized that many other research and sources supported them, and most of it was simple logic and common sense.
Believe it or not, it is actually possible to logically analyze relationships by taking into account the often illogical and irrational emotional factors often involved in a relationship.
WHY PEOPLE GET HURT IN RELATIONSHIPS
The problem with most of us is that we would simply be too overwhelmed by our emotions when it comes to things such as love and relationships, and also because we do not have a set of guiding principles to help us understand our emotions and what is truly happening.
Most of the time, we are still in the midst of discovering ourselves and our way around relationships, embarking on a process of trial and error.
THE NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF A BAD RELATIONSHIP
The danger however is that most of us get hurt in the process, and as a result of us not having a set of guiding principles to help us understand what actually happened and what went wrong, often let our emotions get the better of us and end up developing a skewed or unhealthy mindset towards love and relationships that could eventually hurt ourselves or others further in the future.
Some of us become more selfish in the process, some of us more defensive, more un-trusting, some grow more resentful against the other sex, or some might just lose hope on love and relationships altogether, which shouldn’t be the case if we truly understood what went wrong in the first place, or even better, knew enough from the start to not have to go through all that hurt because we could see it coming or do something about it in time.
THE IMPORTANCE OF FINDING A RIGHT PARTNER
In that 6 part series on relationships, it was also highlighted that:
“If we manage to find the right life partner for ourselves, life can be like heaven on earth; but if we’ve found the wrong one, life can be a living hell”
WITNESSING HELL FIRST HAND IN MY PARENTS MARRIAGE
This phrase meant a lot to me, because I’ve seen how bad that living hell can be first hand in my parent’s marriage over 24 years.
Now, my parents are still married today, but they have been trapped in a living hell for as long as they were married. Let’s just say that the only reason why they’re not divorced yet is because they did not want me, being their only child, to have a broken family.
Honestly, after seeing what kind of life my parents were going through for the past 20 odd years of their marriage so far, I would rather stay single for the rest of my life rather than getting married unless I manage to find someone who is truly right for me.
UNDERSTANDING WHY THEY TURNED OUT THAT WAY
When I first heard that 6 part series of choosing the right partner for life, I immediately understood why my parents marriage turned out the way it did, because they were clearly not the right partners for each other!
It was spot on!
FALLING UNDER 2 OUT OF 8 TYPES OF RELATIONSHIPS THAT WON’T WORK
In a sense that out of the 8 types of relationships that won’t work, my parent’s relationship fell under 2 of them, among other principles that clearly pointed to their incompatibility.
Furthermore, they actually realized them before they got married, just that they could not identify them because they did not know of these principles and were misguided by their emotions and all the myths and concepts about love that our friends and society has influenced us with that might not necessarily be right. I know this for a fact because they would confide in me individually.
To not bore you about the details, I shall not divulge any further; but if you would like to know more, do feel free to ask me personally.
Right now, my parent’s marriage is slightly better, because I was able to pinpoint and identify the exact reasons why they were locked in a living hell together for so long and through much hard work, help them work towards a solution on each of them ever since I came back from Singapore.
However, sometimes, some damages and emotional scares can be too deep to heal completely, especially if two people are fundamentally incompatible from the start and the damage has been done over so many years.
A COMMON PROBLEM
As I got to know more people, I realized that my parents are not alone in this.
There are many other couples out there who are fundamentally incompatible with each other who got into relationships, got married and have kids.
PARTNER VS A RIGHT PARTNER
This made me realize that even if you’re in a relationship, married or have children; it doesn’t necessarily mean that you have found the right life partner.
This is even more dangerous because such relationships often result in much heartbreak, broken hearts and emotional damage, and if the couple got married, divorce, broken families or being stuck in a resentful and unhappy marriage (a living hell) for the rest of their lives; and if they had children, could severely affect their children’s emotional well being and outlook on love and relationships.
THE CHAIN OF HURT & HEARTBREAKS
If you think about it, these could be the start of multiple chains of heartbreak and hurt that is being circulated in our society today.
IF ONLY…
Now, if only more people were aware of these set of relationship principles and had tools to help them find & identify their right life partners and go on to build strong lasting relationships, imagine the amount of hurt and heartbreak we could help avoid, how many happy and loving relationships and families we can help create.
THE “RELATIONSHIP TRUTHS”
At this point, you might be wondering what’s so different about this set of relationship principles that I’ve stumbled upon from all the stuff you find on the internet like Elite Daily or Times or even relationship books?
FUNDAMENTAL VS GOOD TO HAVE/PETTY
If you ask me, the difference is that many of the stuff you find on the internet these days are mostly made up of merely good to have tips that point out the petty issues in relationships and quite frankly, some of which only applies to people who are extremely picky in nature or good to have tips on how to spice up a relationship which are true and good to have, but mostly not core to finding the right partner or building strong lasting relationships; whereas this particular set of principles represent the very core fundamental guiding principles of finding the right life partner and building strong lasting relationships, a comprehensive and definitive set of universal “relationship truths”, if you will, that I have found to be true and applicable to any relationship that I’ve come across over the past 8 years.
CLARIFICATION
Now please don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that you will have to find a perfect partner; or that with these set of principles people won’t face relationship problems anymore.
That is far from the truth because the fact is that none of us are perfect, no two people are perfectly compatible with each other and there are bound to have arguments and huge problems in any relationship.
That is just a fact of life.
THE CORE DIFFERENCES
But there is a difference between normal relationship problems which you can overcome with the right mindset, tools and guidance and fundamental ones that are irreconcilable and just won’t work.
These set of principles would help you identify and hopefully avoid the fundamental ones and provide a guide for you to navigate and overcome the other non-fundamental ones.
CAN UNNECESSARY HEARTBREAK BE PREVENTED?
I was thinking, wouldn’t it be good if there was a reliable guide for people to turn to when they’re facing relationship problems; or a set of tools that will make it easier for people to find the right partners for each other or to maintain and build a relationship?
Wouldn’t we be able to prevent many unhappy relationships & unnecessary heartbreak?
WE COULD HAPPEN’S MISSION
Hence, through We Could Happen, I hope to build a relationship guide with tools that are built on these principles to help people:
- Find & identify their right life partners
- Build strong lasting relationships after they’ve found him/her
THE PROBLEM WITH EXISTING DATING APPS & PLATFORMS
Besides this, I also started We Could Happen because I think that most dating apps and sites out there are either getting it all wrong or still have a long way to go to solving the problem thoroughly.
SUPERFICIALITY & CORE FOCUS
I think that popular dating apps out there right now like Tinder & Skout are great for meeting random strangers, but are too superficial and too focused on sexual attraction (though an important part in romantic relationships, shouldn’t be the only consideration) to help us identify and find the right partner for ourselves.
Yes they are great for us to find random partners to have some fun with, but very rarely the right ones for life; yes there will be some lucky ones who turn out to be the right ones, but it is rare because the focus is set up wrongly.
HOW MOST SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIPS ACTUALLY START
Furthermore, I have also realized that most successful relationships in real life start either as friends or friends of friends.
Think about it, of all the happy couples you know who have successfully found their soul mates; most of them would have already known each other as friends back in school, in college, at work or at an event/friend party/gathering in the past before their paths crossed again or before they eventually discover how amazing they truly are and start hitting it off right?
Either that, or they would have met at a mutual friend’s party, event or in some way been introduced by a mutual friend.
MEETING THROUGH MUTUAL FRIENDS
Guess what, according to a study by scientists at the University of Rochester, meeting through mutual friends still tops the list as the most popular way to meet a romantic partner, as reflected by what actually happens in our everyday lives.
Be it bumping into your friend’s friend when you’re out for dinner with them and getting introduced, meeting at your friend’s birthday party (note that friend who invited you two is your mutual friend) or meeting at a business event or random outing, it is still very likely that you were introduced by a mutual friend in some way or another.
The fact that you’re both being invited to the same event or same outing (e.g paintball or lasertag) by a mutual friend is already in some way an introduction by a trusted source, in this case your mutual friend or friends.
TRUST, SECURITY & COMFORT
There is just this level of trust, security and corroboration that makes it easier for people to open up to each other and begin a relationship if they somehow met through a mutual friend or have crossed paths sometime ago in their lives. That is also why it is the most natural and comfortable way for people to meet their romantic partners and is exactly what has been happening for the majority of us for the longest time.
THE EXCEPTIONS
But of course, there are also those rare few who met as totally random strangers at an airport, a random backpacking trip, or a result of chatting each other up at a bar or a café and ended up being the right ones for each other.
But then again, if everyone was comfortable enough with doing that, why do we still need something like Tinder?
Those of us who are comfortable enough to do that would probably find it easier and more efficient to walk up to someone we like at a bar or a café and just say hi, rather than swiping through profiles and waiting for a match. With the former, at least you’ll get a response and a chance to make an impression.
The only benefit of using something like Tinder is so that you can avoid outright rejections, but most people who are comfortable enough to approach a totally random stranger would also tend be confident enough to handle such rejections.
MORE TO IT THAN MEETS THE EYE
I also believe that there is definitely much more to meeting through mutual friends that made it the most common, natural and successful way to meet a romantic partner all these while.
I suspect that it has probably got something to do with a combination of a few factors such as the similarities people in the same social circles or extended social circles have with each other (cuz birds of a feather flock together), knowing enough information about each other to start off as a result of the warm introduction, having a convenient platform of mutual friends to start building a friendship from, and the level of added trust people have for someone from their extended network as opposed to a complete stranger, among others, that made it the most natural way of meeting a romantic partner.
WHY IT’S HARD TO FIND A TRUE LIFE PARTNER ON EXISTING PLATFORMS
It is also a lack of these factors in the online dating platforms out there today that I suspect contributed to study results such as:
“married couples who met online are 3 times more likely to divorce than those who met face to face”
according to a study by the Michigan State University as reported by The Telegraph, and the negative side effects of online dating such as the “shoppers mentality” that psychologists have raised concerns about, and how it is likely that:
“You’ll find dates online, but they likely won’t be the type you will grow old with”
despite the rapidly rising popularity of online dating.
SO WHAT’S THE SOLUTION?
I believe that the solution lies in strategically combining the ease of connectivity and reach that an online platform could provide us with and carefully merge it into the age old and natural way we have been meeting our romantic partners through friend introductions and natural human interactions.
LEVERAGE ON TOOLS TO BETTER FACILITATE NATURAL ROMANTIC INTERACTIONS
I believe that we should use technology to build tools that would help better facilitate natural human behavior just like how facebook built tools around our natural human interactions to help us better connect with friends.
To me, dating, finding the right life partners, and building successful romantic relationships is the natural next frontier.
BUILD THEM AROUND A SET OF RELATIONSHIP TRUTHS
In addition, the tools should also be built around a set of relationship principles to make sure that relationships are built in a healthy way that is most likely to result in a long lasting and loving relationship instead of casual flings (there are already enough platforms out there that do a very good job for casual flings).
WE COULD HAPPEN’S PLAN
That is precisely why We Could Happen is essentially a relationship guide with a set of tools that are specially built upon a set of relationship principles and around natural human interactions to help better facilitate romantic interactions between people and solve the challenges people face in finding their right romantic partners and building successful relationships.
We have a set of tools that we believe would be able to:
- Help people discover potential candidates from their existing and extended friend’s network
- Get warm introductions with the help of mutual friends
- Make it easier to confess feelings & discover mutual interest
- Turn down someone politely without hurting them
- Get reliable relationship advice & consultation anonymously
- Help spice up, maintain and build romantic relationships
- Provide a reliable go-to platform that would help people navigate through any relationship problem
Right now, we are still prototyping and perfecting these tools, and we will start with a friend discovery and introduction app that we plan to launch soon.
(Do sign up here if you would like to receive updates or participate in providing feedback during our prototyping process)
STARTING SIMPLE & THE PATH WE NEED TO TAKE
Some of you might think that we are trying to achieve too much, or that we have too many features and are too cluttered. As a start, I agree with you; that is why we are going to start with a simple friend discovery & introduction app.
But I believe that the number of features or tools needed to solve a problem would depend on the type of problem that you are solving. If it is to organize the world’s information and make it easily accessible like Google, then it is not about features, but about continually optimizing and engineering the algorithm to do so.
SOLVING A PROBLEM THAT INVOLVES COMPLICATED HUMAN INTERACTIONS
But if the problem you are trying to solve involves complicated human interaction and behaviour, like facebook in trying to connect people, then it requires a unique combination of different optimized tools to facilitate such interactions, such as photo sharing, tagging, likes, comments, status updates, news feed and so on.
But of course, you should always start simple, just as facebook did, and continually optimize each tool/feature, gradually roll out and test new ones and scrap those that don’t work (superpoke, poke etc) until you reach a unique optimized set of tools and features that thoroughly, and I mean thoroughly solves the problem.
If you ask me, We Could Happen is trying to solve a problem that involves complicated human interactions just like facebook did, and hence would need to embark on a similar path.
THE LONG JOURNEY AHEAD
It is going to be a long and hard process, but I think that it is a problem worth solving, because of the countless hurt, heartbreaks, unhappy families and bad relationships we can help avoid and the amount of loving relationships and families we could help catalyze and build.
I NEED YOUR HELP
I can’t do it alone, so if you believe that it is a problem worth solving too, I hope that you’ll help support me in any way you can, by providing your valuable feedback, sharing the word out whenever we are prototyping or launching a tool, joining the team and contributing your expertise in programming, marketing, content writing or investing in We Could Happen.
Let’s help reduce heartbreaks and catalyze more lasting and loving relationships together.
Thank you!
” Let’s help reduce heartbreaks & catalyze more lasting & loving relationships together!”
Johnson Khoo 